Idaho is cold, and beautiful. I can't believe how nice everything is, and a lot of the people are fine.
I came because the voices wanted me to. They wouldn't get off of me. Stupid move. It's too cold for this time of year for me, and mostly I am stressed out and sad. I am running out of meds.
At the shelter everyone is fucking with me real bad trying to run me off. They got into my laundry and stretched the neck out on my shirts.
Phone service was an unbelievable nightmare.
I am ashamed to see how nice it is here. I was considering writing, but right now I guess I can't. I doubt you'll notice here, but just in case.
I see why you like it. I'm glad that there are things in your heart you'd have over me. I'd almost respect it.
Running out of meds, running out of meds, running out of meds.
I'm going to try and stay and see if I'm not well enough to go back to work, but really, I should have faced up to where I was. Although people were teaming up on me too real bad over some old unfortunates there too, and it was getting bad. I sleep better here, but even the guys in the office are using hurtful language when I come through. It's tasteless, but what can you do.
I never knew you for a second, but I'll always love you very much in my own way. That said, I have my own soul to shepherd and although I'm always just a phone call, email, or whatever away, it's not often that I'm lost in Idaho.
I want to write. It's all I think about. But I don't have the strength, because of how upset you got last time. I thought, well really, it upset me how rude it was, and really, I'm over it mostly, but you know, I also do have a lot of fond memories of your friendship, and you do have a special place in my heart.
But I won't be a bother. I might write on my way out and see if I can't survive long enough to check into a rehab somewhere else, but I don't really know anymore what's going to happen to me, or realistically what the outcome will be considering how bad my nerves are.
Ok, I have a million other things to do, but just wanted to say hello, goodbye, and that I won't be a bother.
I see why you like it here, though, and wish you all the best. May all your dreams come true.
Your pal,
Anon